CPT Asshole

Love is not enough

It was so hot, and I was so tired, I didn't even try to keep the sweat from dripping off my face onto hers. We were having sex in my truck, and I was trying to finish, but she wasn't helping.
Things started off great (don't they always), but after she had several orgasms, I could tell she just wasn't that worried about how I felt.

We'd been together a few months now, and I could tell we were going to break up. It wasn't something either of us had come out and said, it was just the way the relationship was headed.
After the intial bliss wore off, we began to treat each other differently. It happened without either of us admitting it, as if we could tell it was over without saying anything. We both knew more about each other, and I was beginning to believe she was using her knowledge of my sexual behavior against me.

She knows I have a hard time climaxing. If anything interrupts me, I have to relax, and start all over to build to climax. At first, she was thrilled I could hold back so long. But after she found out that's the way it is every time, there were times I could tell she just wanted me to hurry up and finish.

This particular evening we were stretched out on the fully reclined passenger seat of my truck, with the windows all fogged up. She's already had several orgasms, and just when I was about to climax, she asked me to stop because her leg was cramping, and she had to shift positions. OK, no problem, I'll start over again.

Bottom line, never have sex with someone unless you WANT to. Doesn't matter if you don't love them, as long as you want to have sex with them, that's what counts. Sure, love helps, but love isn't enough reason to have sex with someone. You love your mother and father, but you don't want to have sex with them. You love your children, but you don't want to have sex with them. You love your husband or wife, but if you don't want to have sex with them, and they force you, that's not right. So love isn't enough. Got to want it. Finally, I've almost built to climax, but she stops me again because she's got another cramp, and has to shift positions. OK, no problem, I'll start over from the beginning.

Maybe this is why, when you know it's over, end it. Don't keep acting like everything is still the same, because you both know it isn't. Once I sense my partner isn't touching me with that certain touch, or speaking in that special tone of voice, it's over. If you take the easy way and pretend it isn't, that's when it can get ugly. Then, as I'm building towards climax, I realize this isn't the first time she's done this. The last few times we've had sex, she's stopped me several times when she felt me coming close to climax. I'm beginning to wonder why she only stops me when I'm about to climax. She can feel when I'm close, why doesn't she just let me finish? Now when we first hooked up, we were all happy and nice to each other, but we're not like that now. We're starting to not care about each other, and all of this starts to become clear to me as she stops me again before I can climax. OK, I'll start over again.

I remember last night, how she kept stopping me, as if she was getting off on the fact that I stopped when she asked. Using me, as she would her vibrator. I had to start all over, it's so hot, I'm so sweaty, I don't even try to keep from dripping on her. This time, will she stop me when I get close? Please, let me finish. But as my climax builds, she asks me to stop. I manage to say "Uh huh", but I don't stop. I'm real close to climax now, and she starts to raise an arm. Thinking she's going to try to stop me, I hold her arm down and finish.

Now she's yelling at me that I raped her because I didn't stop when she asked me to. I think there's two sides to this, and I don't consider what I did as rape. OK, maybe she was uncomfortable some of the time, but I don't believe she was stopping me because she was uncomfortable each time she did it. I think she used her knowledge of my sexual behavior, and was playing with me when she kept stopping me. She wanted to have sex, I never forced her to have sex. If she hadn't played me that way, I wouldn't have forced her to let me finish.

What do you think? Was this rape?

posted by cpt asshole @ 6:20 PM